Flatlanders - Gimme 6, Run to the Fens | RALLERY

After a successful Flatlanders, “Run to the Fens” in September 2021, getting tickets for the 2022 event was a no-brainer.

As soon as Terry and the team released the pre-sale, we were on it. Over the year a few others grabbed tickets. Pre-ordering tickets so far in advance had its down falls, we lost a couple of riders, competition from the local rally in Rhyl and personal reasons. But as a bonus, we inherited Colin Holmes-Smith and his ridiculously fast Series 2.

So the plan was 09.00 from my local petrol station, Colin starting off on his tod from Ormskirk, 40 minutes before. Part 2 was route one to collect Howard (H) on his partner’s Gayer at Knutsford Services on the M6. The weather was good to us when we met H and down the M6 to Stoke. Leaving at 9.00 meant we missed all the school runs and rush hour.

H took the lead, followed by Colin in the middle and me taking up the rear (oooh matron!). Cruising went from 50-55mph, to 60- 65mph, with my trusty winter model not missing a beat. With work and family commitments, it went to Oddballs, then in the shed. Went to Isle of Wight twos up and then in the shed, a few ride outs and then Flatlanders, only thing to be checked was the petrol.

Ragging it down the A50, the trio were chewing up the miles until we came to the Derby turn off, Colin’s Series 2 gave up the ghost. Unbeknown to a lot of people, I have all the gear and no idea. CDi checked, spark, petrol, jets, bump starting followed by a couple of ‘call a friend’ for advice. So, a long push off the dual carriage way to the Burton/Derby services.

Knowing our mates were at the rally, it was going to be something easy. AA called, pulled out the medication sympathy card and they said they would be with him within the hour. H and I shot off, to meet him at the site.

TAKE NOTE, Colin had a call from the AA, saying his tax had expired. Even though it’s an historic vehicle and tax exempt. A free renewal missed by one of the household (not going there to say whose job it was), the best the AA could do was a £500 recovery.

We had an uneventful ride, my exhaust vibrating loose at the head (must check that again), quickly sorted and arrived on site. Parked up next to the Lambretta Chopper UK boys and girls, tents up and drinking. A quick call to Colin and we heard the worse.

Now this became a family affair, his lad left work and drove to Col’s, picked up his van, put his trusty P2 in it and drove the 100 plus miles to Colin. Offered to bring him to the rally, he politely refused and set off on his way. Two miles from the site, in the pitch black (if you know where the rally is it’s dark) the Vespa stopped. After some head rubbing it started and got him to the site. Too late and dark to put his tent up, so he spooned me in my small two-man tent with both our gear.

The bands had already started, Riff Raff & Stank, there were two venues and a great choice of DJs, constantly spinning the tunes: Little Miss Modette, Sully, James Farrow, Darryn G, Terry G, Kevin Andrews and my old mate Kit Armitage. As usual on a Friday night – it was just a blur for me. It was great catching up with loads of old mates and seeing Daz from Lincoln, first time since COVID and who was to make the Renegedaes games team complete.

Up Saturday, first things first, tea, bacon butty and get Colin’s tent up. Then a ride into Ramsey Tescos for snacks and booze, plus H needing a full English. Friday night was all about catching up, Saturday for parts fairs, custom show and games.

Like every good club rally, there was a theme to Saturday, “Bugsy Malone”. The day started with breakfast – all the food stalls on site were varied and incredibly reasonable prices. Custom show kicked off at 12.00, games at 1.00.

After losing out last year we were determined to win. Four teams entered this year with Jim and Julie, from Essex Road Tramps, teaming up with some other scooterists to retain the trophy. Lambretta Choppers UK threw together a “ramshackle” of a team, that had no chance.

First game, hungry human hippos, what could go wrong. We learnt how to win this, through the techniques of the Road Tramps, obviously the Chopper boys watched even more and won (by cheating).

Next game was consuming a cucumber dangled into your mouth – we absolutely destroyed this and won. Then the yard of ale, a young girl did really well, but through cheating and bending, Big H from the Renegades won. We were triumphant, winning two games out of three………wwwwhhhhh, hang on, Terry Vine’s own rules, you got a point for each ball, so the Chopper UK guys stole the trophy from us. Two years running.

The stalls at the rally were great, I bought some get you home bits and there were a few second hand and clothing stalls. I picked up my pre-ordered rally t-shirt and patches.

Next up was the custom show, with some great worthy winners, Boggy getting furthest travelled female and Shaun with best chopper. Lambretta Choppers UK walked away with 5 trophies (I think one was ours).

More food, plenty of drink followed by the obligatory snooze.

One of the pinnacle points for me was stopping the rally to pay respects to “Our Queen”, two minutes silence and then a toast RIP Ma’am.

Tunes were ripping up the dance floor and the bands started. Tommy, Shaun and the boys from Rise Up – who were awesome on their first rally, Stage Fright and Tokyo Rankers heading the bill, with some guest singers on stage.

I remember sliding down a wall, being drunk, dancing and wishing I had a teleporter to get me home the next day.

Up on Sunday, tidied round and set off – home in 4 hours, compared to Col’s 13 hours to get there. This year’s Flatlanders is said to be the last – we can hope that changes. One of the best club rallies on the scene. They welcome vans and campers but they’re completely out of sight. All you see are like-minded people and scooters.

Terry, Taryn and all the crew did a great job – we would certainly promote and support again.

Last point, the charity raffle raised lots of money for the Maggie Oliver Campaign, a local charity, well deserving.